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Blob

I hate my life

This is a long one. Let's go from the start.
1. I am 26. I grew up on a middle class background in a developing war torn country.
2. My parents never gave me a chance. I was the only child and my mother was overprotective of me. For this day me and her don't talk. It pains my heart but she made me deal with so much shit. I had a girl's name. I had a feminine body. I was bullied in school because of it. I have very low very self esteem and depression. No one knows I have depression because mental illnesses are not taken seriously by my community.
After graduating college I got a dead end job at a factory that paid me peanuts and made me work like a dog. Since I am too much of a bitch I let the bosses walk all over me.
3. I don't try or am not motivated to try anything. From a smaller age whatever that I ask for was rejected. This went on till went abroad. I truly don't know what I want or what makes me happy.
4. I have a bachelor of business and I went to Australia to do my Masters degree. After Temperory visa my visa was rejected. All the money I had spent to escape my problems alongside my parents money went down the drain.
5. I fell in love and dated my childhood crush. She played games with me and her mom forced her to marry me when we were both not ready. I was 24 and she was 22. In a foreign country with no job or stability. My girlfriend cheated with another guy and broke up with me.
6. I got addicted to weed in Australia. Spent a lot of money on it and now I can't break away from it cause my housemate is addicted to it too.
7. As a cruel irony I got a job at a burger king restaurant. 2 years of study and 60k later this is what I achieved. I have to work for 20 year old spoilt shits and deal with their problems everyday.
8. Now as of 6-Jul I am 26, financially just hanging in, with no hope, no motivation, and I feel numb inside.

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